BOOK 5

 

                                                              CHAPTER 67

    Crazyness happens when people can’t control their bodies. All she wants is the one-minute bill for your son’s father. Breathe when you can exhale and inhale for an extended period. Liquor popping bottles like an absolute boss do. Let’s change the window to not having a wife in your corner. Cocaine 80 keys broke down into the 20s is a crazy flip. Billions, you don’t want to make $26billion.

     Invest in a good woman to share the same dreams you have. Gangster means taking care of the kids. In exchange for nothing, my children count for me. At the time we started, the comeback was this. He promises I’ll be the best father in the world. With people who care about me, I worry about them. Brother sister, we are all that we have. Grandson, my grandmother would be so proud of the things I’ve done with my life, the kind of lifestyle you have to write to my family. The daughter misses you so much.

 

    You know how important you are to me. It would help if you also worked hard for what you wanted by reinforcing your strength. The more powerful files are always what I said. Sentient studies other malpractice to come up with solutions for human life. The hospital is where no one wants to go, but where everyone comes. Why be disrespectful to one another let's talk. An ambulance is a vehicle that comes when someone gets hurt. Just show up when God blesses you with something. Weapons are destructive, and nothing good about a weapon. Differences that you can make excellent or wrong choices in life. Control your belief, your path, your destiny.

 

    Gathering more people to do better in life is always a good goal to have. Razor, I use this on my body one point in time, like 23 slashes. I felt sorry for myself, but I had to do what I had to do. Jersey, my favorite team Iverson was on. I am attacking someone trying to start a fight with that person. My goal is for everyone to keep an eye on me, investigator, most of the time when they think you’re doing something terrible. I believe in achievement. I would not be where I am unless I was.

 

    This is the end of the mission. This will be the last album. It’s hard to say goodbye. Let me get my job done. My life has changed for the better. My fear is not keeping it up. I have to remain focused when the odds are against me. The only thing that comes to mind is faith. I want everyone to know that I’m not afraid.

    Just knowing that the world will end someday, people tell me to get off my great horse. How are you doing? Glasses keep your eye vision on point. 037, do you remember that rule when a dog fights, all dogs fight. That is what I was looking for. Wonder where we went wrong at. Drop point was this taxi driver X gon’ give you bullpen still 031 understand the rules. They say OG Tye died with the weapon on which hand my point stands on the left DAMU.

 

    Who can sex you tonight? Let’s talk around the table and get on with it. All those girls out there have my eyes on one. Maybe she wants me. I promise not to be overprotective. She knows what I’m talking about. Talking to a woman can be challenging, but I’m prepared for the challenge. I only want a woman I can’t have if she gives it up. Her pimp will die in my jay z voice. There is no me without you. Baby, now that we wrap this shit up. Didn’t I say I had you? It’s challenging to take care of yourself. I congratulate you for all you have done for us.

 

    My lousy behavior causes you to leave. I know I’ve made mistakes, and problems have occurred. How can I make this up to you? Everybody knows how much I love you. If this is not true, I would be your king, and you would be my queen. How can I make the right choices? I’m just human. Why cheat on the woman in her dreams? Can I take the time to explain my heart? Come closer to me, and let me whisper something in your ear. Let’s make this enjoyable when you call me. I say hi, and you say, “baby, I love you.” Just hearing your voice makes me feel good. Don’t you ever take away your love? That’s what people do.

 

    Let me take care of your whole body. All night I am touching your body. Undressing your mind just my thoughts. I cannot get over you and how you make love to me. This man is full of ideas. Say what I’ll tell the wife to get her at the moment. Caption the thought of us walking in the park. It’s too many things to take out of you. People still don’t understand me or how I think. It takes time for us to make love. Baby, let’s not rush to see me when you see me. 

 

    So contact me sexually anytime you’re ready. We are going to have some babies as you can be my baby. Kids are just a part of our future like I told you in time. We shall have everything I promise from the bottom of our hearts. You don’t gotta go home. Why do you cause one man to cheat? You shouldn’t blame every man because some men are faithful. Dogs need respect from a female dog. Going out all night for money is not in a woman’s head. Take it easy so that you don’t get hurt. We can’t fall out now. Let’s make life better and have some puppies. This game isn’t for everybody but those in it. Have fun and live life to the fullest. Patiently waiting to get to this point. The mic is all I need. 

    Let people know my feelings about this life. I try to remain out of the water and trust. I know how deep the shit goes. Let me get back on my bullshit as I said, one in the bedroom and sixteen in the video. Does he or does he not leave alone. God knows how to judge and test me. Rain might be the answer to all of my problems. 

 

    I have to keep my head up and grind through life as a man. It’s for all my people that bring justice to black people. How many of us know Mac knowledge. That’s all I’m going through. Look who’s ready for everything. If you understand the rules, why is no one following them? There are many people set tripping. I cannot understand that because we are under one umbrella.

 

    It can be so hard to go ahead. Check out who you are. People fill others’ minds with thoughts about their cheating partner. Let’s sit here and talk about our life. I want to commit to you. My heart belongs to one person, and it is my life. Take the time out and realize what you have in front of you. Why should I want it to stop? Let them talk about you and me when you get along so well in that relationship. That is not going to make us or break us.

 

    Where do fights come from in a relationship? When you have a man or a female telling their partner lies. What does it mean to cheat if you have someone who loves you? I know I’ve had many girls in my past. I apologize for everything that has happened. Now, I am a changed man. I know I have to prove that is not the case. How long it’s been, good Lord. I’m staying with my family because I want what is best for you and my kids. As we grow, the kids grow up too. They watch what we do.

 

    Say yes, and all problems will be solved. Imagine going up behind the ghost with me by your side. Believe me when I tell you that I can do it. It’s only a matter of time. All you need to do is come to your senses and respect your man. Undressing your mind, body, and soul. I know it’s hard to be a serious person if you do everything wrong. Let’s get back on track and handle things the right way. I just want to give you all of my love.

 

    Only if you knew how hard I work to better our lives. When I see you, what do you think I mean. Maybe getting you in bed at night. When we wake up in the morning, you cook me breakfast. Let’s talk about where this is going. We should not play games with each other. Let us be honest with one another. So everything can go peaches and cream. 212, come on, baby. Have you thought about starting this family with me, or will we be co-parenting? That is my point.

 

    I have always wanted to write to you. If I was hanging out all night in these streets, how would you like that? I’m at home trying to start a business. So I can pass this inheritance on to our kids. Nothing will stop me from giving them the best life they can have, even if it takes my life. I will do my best to make sure our kids want for nothing. Let us agree on what our kids expect us to do. What happened to love and affection. It’s for the best.

    Let me tell you that this relationship is not as you say. You are running around with everybody. This is what I'm hearing. Please do not act like it's not true. In due time I will find out. All things in the dark come to light because twenty-one years running things that need to be done. I still can't believe you're out of line with what I've done in my past. Telling me to relax, and now you're just doing the same thing. You know what they say, what goes around comes around, and it starts all over again. Please keep it on the down low.

 

    Telling lies go out with the girls. You know how to cheat. It's just that you do it on the low. Promising that our life would be together. It's been damn near 28 years since you have been out of my life. The thought of me letting you down because you don't even take care of a house. This bothers me, and I cannot get over it. I am thinking of handing over another girl. You expect me to take care of whatever you want. I've had cars, clothes, houses, and everything she sees. This sounds like fun.

 

    Things have to change for the better. Let's take our time. We are still young. You don't come around me, and I'm not around you at no time. I think it's time to have a change of heart. I've had enough of this bullshit, and I'm running from the FED. All those days out of town trying to get money what you think I'm doing here, it's broken. Every trip in and out of town thinking about you. Going all out to make sure you are good. That is what a man does for his lady.

                                                          CHAPTER 68

    Why do you work for a family when they don't like you? The only thing I want is my baby back. I know she's holding me down. Just the thought of her never having sex again makes me strong. Sure I can walk the rest of my life with her. The trust was always there. Believe me. I know what we've been talking about with our daughter about our future. Baby, can you hear me? I'm not giving up on this love when I think about her time in the house on convent 151. Gangsters move in silence. We will never tell everything that went on in our kingdom.

 

    When you're on these streets, it's how you play the game that you're in. Fuck what people think you and I know what's going on. Kids have no future if their parents aren't raising them. How hard it is to protect our children because the kids reflect us. When it all boils down to it, we play a role that our kids have to follow. The kids learn from what they see other people do, especially their parents. You have to show them right from wrong. You have to tell them that the streets are bad for them.

 

    Now I have got you all by yourself. I want to do all the things I had in mind. I want to hold you in my arms. Be mines and only mines. What do you say about that? Let's not waste any time getting to know each other. What is your plan for me, and do you know I have plans for you? I do nothing but be with you. We always should go through life helping each other out. It should be when you tell yourself how much you value yourself.

 

    How many power moves do we have to make? I'm supposed to look at you like we have it all. It's hard to take care of you as we sit here, understanding our lives. We put up everything to keep this relationship tight. This shit gets tricky when I'm trying to figure out what's important, and that being together or handling this work that's in front of us. All I know is I'm willing to do both to keep you happy. Staying by my side means the world to me. You said to start a new company. Now, look at the outcome. Are you proud of me?

 

    It's always about what you do with someone else that reflects your life. You have to wait until the good gets out of her. However, you show her much love. You can't cheat on her, or she can't cheat on you. Days go down in history. Just put things in your book about our love for each other. There are so many things that can be done. I know that we can make things right when we're both on the same page together. It starts with the long-term well-being of your life.

 

    Once it's all over, you know you have a special place in my life. We have to build our future together and stay strong out here. When you have nothing to show for what you have been involved with, you can change your game plan. Find something else to do with your time and money. Follow the rules of the game, and everything will go according to plan in your life. I need you to stay focused on what is on the table and handle yours to the max.

    I don't want to be friends if you can't love me. This man has to step in and make sure you understand that the love is there. When you wonder where I'm at, or should I be wondering where you are. We have to be one. Make sure we know each other every move. People cheat every day. We cannot let that happen to us. We know the talking connection. I cannot wait to be in your life again. This comes from my heart. In due time we will be with each other.

    If it all goes the way I plan, we will have everything we need to live our lives. It is not that hard to be in this relationship. Why is it a problem when we cheat? I know I have many ladies in my life. Times can get better in due time. We can go out and enjoy ourselves. Don't be blind to the fact that I love you. If I was clubbing and you were at home taking care of the children, how would you feel about that? When we could party together, you can dance, and I can throw singles at you. The only difference is that we can make love to each other when it's over.

 

    When your hood loves you, it's the only way to come up. Being a part of this scam is bullshit. Who cross me ready to pass the wire to my women. So she can light shit up this shit that we are in. Fine, you can live your life. Stay on the low. Why do you bring attention to yourself? Cash rules the world, and girls make the world go around. I'm just lying. Money makes this world go around. Yes, I'm going to continue to get this money. When you're down on these streets, you have to watch your back all the time to the east.

 

    You look cute today. Even if you didn't see me, I saw you. I hope you are with me. I do not want to change up, lovers. How can you look so good to me, baby? Your heart is filled with love and affection. I need to make love to you some time. It doesn't take that long to know that you agree with what happened in our last hundred and twenty-five minutes. The days I'm not with you can be challenging. Nevertheless, we have to remain vital for our family. It's up to us if this is what we want. We can never walk away from one another.

    First, you have to get your game together. Yes, I will overcome. The game changes day by day. I'm sure I'll be with you as long as you're with me. You do not have to worry. Men let females dislike them for any reason. It's always going to be hard for them. The woman in my life is good. They are going to be taking care of my kids. That's why I'm writing about what went on in our lives. Why can't I just say I love you? Could you believe in me?

    What type of girl does not want their man to do for them? You got to watch whom you lay down with because there is good and bad sex out there. Don't they ever get shot for theirs? I cannot believe this. They want to see me fucked up. It's not going to happen. Get ready for war. Getting back on the grind means more money, cars, and clothes. I never like people against me because they will try to murder me. I cannot let that happen to me feel me.

 

    I need a woman by the side that I can count on in time of need. One who is there for the longstanding relationship will be my children's mother. So, she will take care of my children and me. This man wanted a relationship with this girl he knew. Nevertheless, he was unsure how to tell her that he liked her. They did everything together. He said that was one sign of her liking him.

 

    As a man, I am supposed to make the first move if I like a girl. That is just how it goes. You have to treat her the right way when you get with her. You have to love this person with all of your heart if you want to make it work. If you want people to understand what you have been through, write a book. So people can read what happened to you. You have to control your feelings for your good if you love your family.

 

    Having children is not the right thing to do. That is why I try to keep my kids away from all of that. If they are looking for love, you should look for your father. I will keep my promise to my family. I always wanted to be on top of my game. Do not try to bring me down because I will not fall with you. So keep trying. How can you help me out? That is what I need to be asking you. That is the most crucial question.

 

    I control my dreams and what I make out of them when it is in motion. Follow me, and I will not lead you on the wrong path. Trust me to stay true to yourself. Whomever you hang out with, make sure you take your time with everything. You do not need people hanging out with you in trouble because they might get you in trouble by doing something they do not have to do. This world has many places to see. I have always wanted to travel.

    People that do not have the mind to better themself cannot understand what I'm trying to do with my life. Having sex with anybody is not healthy for me, which means my kids on my block would not like that. Many girls have unprotected sex with many men. I am not getting involved with them because unprotected sex leads to death, and I am not going for it. I prefer to spend time with the girls I know.

    Let us talk about girls who want money from men. They will do anything that the man wants from them. The mind is one of the most substantial parts of the body. So use it wisely. I have been through it all. There are not many things that I am scared of out there. I want everyone to know that I'm doing this because I'm capable, just like you want to stop me. So what you set me up is turned out for the better.

 

    Turn it up, and that is what I meant. You had to be quick for me to enter your soul. However, I guess you knew that because you handled it, and I am proud of you. Do not ever turn your back on my family, okay. Why cause I will be on to the next one you would not like that right no. I am still trying to find out what you want from me. Is it breezy, love? Baby, this has been a journey for me and you. However, I am willing to test it out.

 

    Jesus gave me a map, and I followed it the way it was written. I got many questions for the people who know the Bible better. I'll never forget you were a part of my life if I remember anything. I am getting back on my feet was not because of you. It's because I made it come true for me again. You never had any respect for me and what I was doing when I was out there hustling. However, I stood here before you as a man.

                                                                   CHAPTER 69

    Why should I trust them when they are the reason I am here on these streets and not with my family? It's more of you all against me, right. So why wouldn't I protect myself from all of you? I just feel like making love to you now. Nobody has to know about you and me. They ask me what happens to you and me. I am not going to let them know.

    We need to know what Jesus has blessed us. This is the start of a new beginning for us. If you are blessed, thank God for all He has given you. I want the best life that I can have. I hope my family forgives the mistakes that I made in this lifetime. Just look at what I did with a bit of time. When we grow up with you, it all just stops. You took care of the kids we had and had to go to school.

 

    Take this little girl growing up with the thought of being my wife. She does not know, but I am waiting on her to get older. Now we have been through thick and thin. There is nothing we can't overcome in this world. Why is it so difficult to return to my family life? We have to come to an understanding of what we want. Sometimes I do not know what to believe. You say you are there for me, but I am unsure.

 

    You are right about us when we hook up. We promise to make a good family. We had many dreams. I am trying to make those dreams come true. I'm working and not much sleep, but I will do whatever I have to do for you. I promise it. Time will only tell if we will be together. Bad things do happen, so let us stay positive. I have to think about if I want to play this game. Dear heavenly Father, bless me some more to continue to do good.

 

    As young black men, we have to break our habits. Our family is falling apart, and men stepping out on their wives. It is not getting any easier for us. It is only getting harder, but you know what I'm going to handle. Sometimes I wish people get off my back and let me handle my own. If you're mine, why are you with other men while I'm home alone? Being sick gets on my nerves because I can't do anything about it.

 

    In these times, we need as much help as we can get from people. God knows how often I pray for my family these days. However, this young boy does not know anything about it. I am learning how to be a good parent to these kids. I cannot believe that I lost you. I can remember when you said you would catch one of my bullets. I was traveling when you said that, but I felt what you said. Now I understand what you meant.

    Do you know that there are no more hardcore rappers in the game anymore? We need to bring that back. When I get my company back, I am looking for not all of the dancing. We need people with real stories out there. I like poets too. I love the music you can dance to, but not always. The music started with people fighting among themselves is not the essence of music. Let's get back to the roots of the music and let everybody have a chance in this game.

 

    How can we say that we were in love at a young age? I guess it was puppy love, as Bow Wow says. Now we are older, and it should give us a chance to find out if love keeps us together. It's always the same thing money is low. That is what we tell all of our girlfriends. What about making it easier when they need to do it? Having a family isn't easy as it looks more challenging than you think.

 

    I sense people in an imaginary player who knew that crossing me is not appropriate for his health one day. Nevertheless, I understand that people do what they have to do to get in the game when nobody pays attention. People sometimes do not understand what I'm saying to them. I know that day hurt you. Nevertheless, you know what I was trying to tell you. God showed us things we do not always understand, but it is meant for us.

 

    There will always be a person above you, and that person is Jesus. We know we have to take our time. We can't rush anything. Patients are everything. You have to live by all the rules when you live this life. I want to take the time to thank all the people in my life. It's hard, but knowing that I have a family depends on me. The microphone, when writing my pen, is real. This work was hard when I first started. Now it becomes easy after writing the first story. God got me in his prayer, and I shall never let anybody take that from me.

    Who is real, and who is not real? I am making way for my family to have whatever they want. Let us keep this life we have on track. We are to respect each other and do for each other. We cannot ever cheat on each other. By the way, we have to work hard at trusting each other. It is the only way we can have a relationship that lasts forever. Standing next to each other makes us strong. It's like we can do anything we want together. Let us keep our family first and take care of what needs to be done.

    This only makes things harder for a man. When all he knows are the streets. I grew up handling business my way. That is the only way I know how to handle business. You never know what is going to happen out here in these streets. Ghost streets, I live with it. What do you live by? It makes much sense when you are getting money out here. Sometimes, you have to fall back to see whom you are running with if loyal. People think you should take care of yourself as much as possible.

 

    When everyone is scared of you, that makes you a gangster. Are you a mob boss of New York City and make much money doing it? You have to sell many drugs in this mob, and murdering people come with it. When you are out here on the corner selling drugs makes you a gangster. That is just what gangsters do. If you have any beef, you take care of it right away. That is another thing gangsters do.

 

    I want to get out of the game one day. That is why I work so hard doing what I do: writing books, writing movies, Short stories, and being a poet. I love what I do more than anything in this world. I do not want to die at a young age. I want to be old and around my grandkids. That is how a gangster goes out. You have to watch everybody and get what you can get out of the game.

 

    What is your purpose in life? My purpose in life is not to take but to give my father what I did not have. Not because he would not be there, but because I think they knew who I was. What is the main reason you work so hard because I want to set goals for myself? Let the kids know they can do whatever they want? You have to love what you do to have fun doing it.

 

    Having this dark spot on my hand means I will enter the light, and whoever is with me will follow where I go. I think my heaven is different from everybody else. What I found out from being out of town makes me believe in Jesus Christ. I know that I can wake his soul. It does not matter if he's in heaven or in life itself. He said he would return, and I believe that.

 

    These young kids are thinking about opening up a spot on their block. Pressure will be on them from the police. I guess they can handle the whole thing. They had seven hundred thousand dollars worth of work. When you are out there getting money, people want you dead. Most of the time, people end up dead. The drug game is the most challenging game to play in this world because you can lose your life.

 

    If you win in this game, you can move on and have a better life for yourself. People are always trying to bring you down because of ninjas in it with you. You don't get what you get, and it makes them uncomfortable. I fail to understand that they are taking the same steps. I'm trying to level my life and stand firm for my kids. I know they have to eat, and they need homes to call home. I did not come up with my name. Trust me, and I will trust you.

 

    I'm trying to make as much money as I can make. So my kids will be taken care of. That is why my business is so important to me. This kid had a gun in his hand, and he wanted to use it to look for money. I'm trying to tell him that is not the way to go about it. He is telling me, but I need money. So work for it if you cannot hustle and become something in this lifetime. Times are always going to get hard. It is what you make of it.

 

    If you have a passion for selling drugs, that is all you will do out there on these streets. I mean, I hustle, but I have more than one hustle. I am not one to back down from a challenge. There is more than one way to get money. I had to make up for the time that I missed. My kids are grown up, and I feel what my dad went through. I am working so hard to ensure that it is money for themselves when they are older.

                                                                   CHAPTER 70

    It becomes complicated when you never try to change your ways. Why do we fight when their young children do not. I made my name none, and you cannot forget it. Trust me, and I will not let you down. We are close to 2017, so let us change our ways. People are using our black females for sex. As black men, let us take care of our black females. If it starts with me, maybe more will listen to me. Never let someone know what you have because they may want to prepare you for money or drugs. Always stay aware before you get murdered. Do not worry about what another person got okay.

 

    This is the truth about life. Making money made people mad. It will help if you do not let your guard down. How can I take a stand in life to become something that my family can be proud of? I always had a good time making music and being a writer. Everything I speak of, I have lived it. I'm getting stressed out over this drug shit. Selling it and being the boss made me learn about handling mine. So I will be okay, and life will be a little easier.

 

    I'm not here about the black people. I'm not sure where I'm going. When my time has expired, I know where Jesus is. I followed him and what I did for him. Giving him wings to fly and what he did for me. By helping me stay focused on my writings, people fight with each other every day. People are dying every day in life. We fight every day for a better life for our family. It's not too hard to focus on what you want to be. You have to control your life to the fullest.

 

    It is hard to tell you that you cannot have sex with me. Let us show these kids how to take hold of this shit. Money never comes in like I come back and get it. It is not good that you talk too much. Meanwhile, I'm calm handling this business. I mean big business. People are getting a little bit of Money shit that you can only re-up with.

 

    This is the way it should not come out as a women worth. Be a man. Get up and get a job to take care of your family. I wanted to have as many kids as I could. We did not want to tell you that most of us were like men. These girls had everything but a man in their life. Then one day, God sent them one man, and they are thankful for that. This man was strong, and one of the females knew a saint.

 

    Set a date on any date, and you will find yourself in control of your life. I ask myself why we fight with each other when it leads to death. Being Sexy nowadays is a death ticket because HIV can catch it. It is looking like everything that we plan for is coming true. Growing every day makes me older mind. That means to start a family if you have one. Make it the best time of your children's lives.

 

    I do not have to tell you this again. It's coming to a time when I will be in these children's lives. Trust me. I cannot wait until you, and I raise this family until the day comes. What's that connection to somebody living inside of me? Ensure the business is handled by all means. I must continue to be a business person. Planning for the future means whatever the outcome is.

 

    This business deal is on the table. Will I take it and run with it or not? Who knows what I would do? If you were in my place, what would you do? I have done the right thing by writing short stories and owning essential companies. I'm not going to be a part of my life. I'm going to get into life until I die. That is how hard this kid is going to work. You cannot compare me to them because my knowledge is different.

 

    I had to work for everything in my world. Friends Come when money is showing, but where were they when I was grinding. I Watch older dealers sell those drugs, wondering how much money they make. I hope that you are taking your time with these men these days. I can remember when y'all came to see me. Then uncle Clyde was riding the dirt bike, and I blew up that car and gave you my ring for your hand in marriage.

 

    I do not like fighting many things at the same time. I like to spend time doing one thing at a time. Nevertheless, the work comes so fast, understanding everything as and when. It is not an issue, but it does complicate matters. I have been through everything that this man can take from these streets. I cannot give up now because it has come to a point in my life where it is only getting better for me. I keep my head high.

    I wonder where my heavens are because I accomplished what my Jesus wanted me to accomplish. So I assume I'm going where his soul is with my family. I can love you better than anybody else. You know that the last person you sleep with in your life is the person you go to bed beside when you go to paradise. That is why I do not say too much about having sex but tell my family to stick with me.

 

    What is a person sent from heaven? They call them heaven-sent. Look, I know it must be a nice place. I know I'm the one whom Jesus chose to handle His business here on earth. Somebody had to do it. Why not Sporty. When you first start going to school. You meet different girls there, and you fall in love with them. They are also falling in love with you. You can learn many different things from what you learn. You may want to go to that area of work.

 

    Once I was home, I knew that I could make moves for us. Life goes on and on. It is what you make it. People understand to do the right thing, and God Will bless you in many ways. I know no one can take care of me as you can. Ladies, I'm trying to remain in your life. You know I intend to marry you. It seems like that is the only way to be with you. Baby, do not let it get away from me.

 

    That bloody shit was a decisive move at the time. They wanted sex, money, and murder to leave the city. So he could lock 101 status blood codes, and that was what I did. They were going mad on the streets. I wanted to be alone with her to talk about our problems. Suppose you want me to love you. You have to give yourself time and take care of these kids. To talk to you means everything to me. I'm telling you, you're not on your own.

 

    I'll have people right outside your house ready to murder you. My people are not playing. They want that dough that you have. You better come Out before it gets messy. I mean, bodies are going to drop. It's like Jesus gave me a gift that does not make me Him. Nevertheless, what I have learned in my soul makes me believe in him. It's like the Devil is inside of me. My point is, that they were fighting within me.

 

    This is the way you make money. You have to save money. Then You will have a lot of money to spend. They will try to take from you. This is what I had to do. I was supposed to start at the bottom and go up to the top. Suppose my last days had to come. It will be with my family. The love of my life is inside of me, and her children live with us as mother and father. This way, we could protect all of you as one.

 

    I'm a drug lord, and I'm not proud of it. I know it has something to do with people dying. It is a lot of drugs and money that we come a custom to. Fast money is not always good money. You have to be in these streets. You have to watch your back at all times out there. The things going on on my block are crazy because they act as if they want me alive. They get their hustle on every day running from the police. I'm on the block to work. I got it too. I'm on the low, but they know I got it.

 

    This little kid was connected to many families. He was not interested in the family business. He wanted to start his own business. So he wanted to become a writer and started writing. He hustled hard to own his company, and it was doing well. We both know I could shoot one of you if I had to. That was a part of this game we were in. Part of my life has been in this game for a long time. I'm trying to keep my life in my family.

 

    I have to plan out what we need to do on this day. The days go by, and it is getting closer. That means we will be together again. Let us remain strong with this love. I know we are together in our minds and souls. I step out of the house to go to my friend's house. I have to take the train to get there. I go to the station, and I run into a girl. She said I looked all right. So I went to my friend's place. He was not here. That is what his sister said.

 

    I feel like she loves me. I have no idea if she is cheating on me. I'm a strong man, and I'm just making away for me to get money so that I can do for Us when we needed. As a man, it is hard. These emotions for you are getting stronger. I'm the last of a Dying Breed. That means I was born in Moe. Do you love me? I talk about love because that gangster shit means nothing to me, my kids, and their mothers.

                                                                 CHAPTER 71

    I know times look like it is getting hard for us, but we have to be here. Many people change into different lovers every day. That is not good for us, and you know that baby. This love feels so good to me. Do you know that? Everybody has fought in their relationships. We are not saints. We all go through problems, but I want to stay with you. I do not want us to break up because I love You. We should always be able to talk to one another.

 

    Why would you want to leave me? I know why, but I slept with others. I must know how you feel because if you were cheating on me, I would be mad at you too. I guess we were in the last few days because you were angry, and I know why. How could you leave and give my sex to another person? Baby, I did not need to leave town. I did that for us, and you know why.

 

    I have dreams when I sleep. It has told me that you are the one. Stay in the house because you know it's love here. There has known love for anybody else. It's so hard to do this for our kid's home where I want to be, and so are you? People leave their kids. I cannot do that. This is not one of the games that we play. I have to be a father to these kids.

    We have these skills to take care of our kids and make sure they go to school. As a father, I want my children to believe that I am the most excellent father in the world. I do not want my kids out here acting out and having fights with other kids. It is because I want them to educate. It is one of the essential skills you need. Growing up without a father makes me want to give my kids everything to help them out in life. As long as they do the right thing, they can have all they want.

 

    As young black males, we must improve our game and be there for our young children. To show them that this is more than they can do and remind them that they cannot achieve anything if they put their hearts into it. Young kids are having babies. The reason is not that they do not have Homes to go to but because their mothers and fathers are not caring about what they go Through. These days, you need support from your parents.

 

    I want mine to know that I am here for them. So they don't have to be as concerned as other children without their parents. One day I want my kids next to me to show them the finer things in life. The responsibility of birthing kids is to care for them at all times. You have to know right from wrong. All you can expect is the best for your kids. So try to teach them everything about life.

 

    I will tell my child how his life is essential to his mother and me. I will tell my children to hold their heads up at all times. If it made me believe everything in my life would go the right way, I would want to have a child very soon. She knows who she is. You are the person I am waiting for. I hope you understand why it is taking so long that is what She is talking about. Everything is going well to ensure that family money is not a problem, and I believe that too.

    My grandmother passed away. My god uncle was like move down south because he heard about the problems I was getting into. So I moved down south, knowing that we would be out of town with money and drugs. Taking trips, I must a meant that I loved it. The hardest part was not knowing what kind of girls I was with. Were they going to leave me and have a new boyfriend with my kids in the house?

 

    So I moved down south. I knew there was no way I could cheat. So sexual intercourse had to be connected to a family member, but only God could understand. That was why I walked through the ten commandments. I was born on Saint Patrick's Day. So I had to pack tricks. I knew I had to keep my eyes open by moving work down south. It's Kinder fucked up when you lose everything. Nevertheless, I knew the money trips I was taking would be there for my family. On 1/7/2000, this female came down south me, not knowing if it was a setup. Wondering how much trouble I get when it's over. I got sick.

 

    I plan on getting my life together. I saw two kids, and the best thing I ever showed them was mad love. To let you know, whoever is forever in my life will be taken care of with no questions asked. Trust me. I do not want to see you cry. Nevertheless, I had to leave to protect myself. Do not let another person take what's mine. I mean me and you making love again. If you thought about it, you better change your mind.

 

    I asked her to call him. She said yes and then she phoned him. I asked him where he was, and he replied that he was playing basketball in the park. What park battleground are you coming over here too? Yeah, how long Will you be there for another two hours? All right, I'm on my way. The pressure is all on me. I know you're all working, so you're under a certain amount of pressure. If you do not want me to help you, I guess that's the end of you and me. I try to protect myself against the ones who don't like me.

 

    Baby, I'm a young man with a lot to offer to someone like you. Do you want more for yourself? I know how I had to learn what to do to a woman. I know how to treat her now. I can't believe you want someone to mistreat you. They had to understand that it was for us. So once they did what they did, I left town. I was around many folks. I was among those who did. First I had to learn about their city.

 

    I will always love you. Nothing is ever going to change that right. Suppose we have sex with someone else. You know how strong our mind is. It will still hurt. How many kids do I have out there? I just have to know that they are good, and they know Daddy is coming home. I know I have to protect myself against those who don't like me. First, you have to plan out who will make the killing. Then you have to set it up because you do not want him to know what is about to go down.

 

    It has to be a better place than here. I hope to be there someday. Our fathers set this life for us, and I meant it is a good life. I'm not going to give up. These streets cannot trap me. I have to be smarter than that. What is the other drug dealer talking about? Our mind is on taking care of one another. We are not ready to die, but we know it can happen. We have to be on our best behavior.

 

    All I have in this world is my word, and I stand by it. I cannot stand when a girl lies about what she is doing. Just be honest with me because I am your man, and I would not lie to you. It takes a home to sell drugs. It will help if you convince people to sell on your behalf. You have to trust them, and they have to trust you. Please don't bring it around your family. You don't want to get them in the mix-up with that.

 

    You all know it makes you blow up one of the people they want to come back and blow up one of us. You better be ready because I don't play guns kill people. There is no coming back from that. It will help if you stay calm. Let us fuck what People think. Get the money. That is what I want you to do right now. That is why I'm writing now. So when I am ready to open the company, I will have something to open up. This is why it's taking me so long to open it up. I'm not rushing to open it up. Nevertheless, if it opens up right now, I will be happy. 

    I must be better than anyone in this game. Right now, you're on your own. This way, I can make the moves I have to make. I'm here for you, I hope for the rest of my life. I do not want to see you with another man. Trust me. You don't want me to see a different girl. If I have a baby, my child will get everything. By whom you know, I'm trying to be truthful.

 

    Now he has to go back to the train station to 151 street. He gets off the train and walks to the park. When he got to the park, they were playing ball. So he is watching the game. Now that I have gotten myself together. I can handle my business on these streets. I do feel bad about what happened between you and me. You did not understand that Jesus was on my side and gave me something to do.

 

    I'm trying to cover up things that happened to me when I was 12. I think that you stayed here to find out what the outcome was. I was seventeen when I realized that I needed to focus on my home. I was going back to New York City to handle my business. I had to stay in touch with my friends because we had issues. So that is what I did. So I was living a double life.

 

    What makes us different is gender. I know you carry those kids till they are ready to be born. So you know everything has got to be about you if he doesn't want to be there. However, you should know that it takes two to make a baby. My friends and I were out before it happened, and it was like People trying to get at us. Nevertheless, that did not stop us from doing what we had to do. I know the girls that were in my life were mad back then.

                                                                CHAPTER 72

    I want you to be by yourself. I do not think you're hooking up with another man. I remember walking down the stairs, and you were there, making me climb the stairs. So you can make love to me. I cannot control what is going on in their mind. Nevertheless, they will Murder me. I know I'm marked to be dead. So while I am here, I will make sure I am a problem to those who do not like me.

 

    It is because good and bad thoughts flow in my mind. I'm good now, but it is taken a while to get back. That is what makes me like this. I have been through a lot of ups and downs. When I got to the top, I would not let anybody bring me down from where I am at. Other drug dealers want me dead. Nevertheless, I keep moving on while my pockets are getting bigger. I am going to keep growing.

 

    Together, we are as essential as ever. There is no way they can stop me unless the way of death. You and I know that this is not going to go well. Jesus is significant in my life. He promises to protect me while I am here on earth. There are too many drug lords in New York City. I know half of Them. The other half has beef with me. I have been there selling cocaine, weed, and crack. The police want me off these streets. They will do anything to make that happen. 

 

    Everybody is trying to get money out of it. Every block has an name. My block name is uptown. You better keep the thang on you, and you better be ready to bust a person for yours. It is the biggest company in the world. I am not after the money. I just wanted to do good. The people are writing work for me. I feel like everything in this world has to pass through my company.

 

    I know they want to come after me, but my older family members are prepared to do that. Yes, they look like they are ready to body someone. Those young kids are walking around like they cannot get bodies. After you make the killing, you have to find somewhere to put the body. So they cannot find it with fingerprints on it. People are unable to talk about what has happened.

    My inner self is still working, which is essential to me. As a result, the money will not stop because our family needs it. I just want my father to get released from jail. If I have to bail him out, I will. If you're ready to take them, let me know by doing so. I cannot take It. This killing shit is making me more in teach with myself. I'm watching my back from everybody out there in this game we play. 

 

    Just chill and take it easy. I will not rush you to have sex with me. I know it takes time for us to lay down and do that. I will wait until you are ready. Trust me, and I will not hurt you. I feel for each other. Many people sell drugs. You don't want beef with them. So you try to watch out for them. Sometimes drug lords buy from each other. Nevertheless, most of the time, you can't trust them.

 

    Have you known fear about anything in this world? I want you to do everything you can to be here. That is important to our family. If you had chilled, you wouldn't be where you are right now. I know it has a lot of money in it. I know it is going to change many things. I will be able to take care of my family. All that money I earn goes to my company. I know the stock is in good shape. That means people will always invest in my company.

 

    Do not let people get that close to you if you watch them close, all right. What you're facing is essential to know whom you want it from. I continue to make my way in life. I want you to tell me you're ready to have sex with me. I know you want that ring on your finger saying we are married. I guess that is when the family starts well. Let me tell you something I am not leaving because I want to be with You.

 

    After they finish playing the ball, he asks her if he wants to go to a show. Her answer is yes, and why not. So they went home to get dressed to go to the concert. Many people are going to perform. They called each other when they got dress. Are you sure you want me? I know my child is involved with this. That is why I'm not mad at you. Whatever it is, you need to show me that you want me. I cannot watch you suffer when you're my kids' mother.

    We should not complain about the way we live. If I could not do it, I would not do it. Do you know we had these kids when we were kids? I knew what I was doing. I had to get back home. When I got back home, the five were still popping, and all of the older men were happy to see me back home. 

 

    When the babies are born, I will be there to make sure she or he is Good. I know it is going to be fun taking care of a child. I'm willing to let you believe me. If the question, you cannot tell the police what happen. If you do, you'll go to prison for a short time, but you'll make time. That is not good telling the police.

    I wonder whom they said he murdered. He better be a gangster, and if he crosses you, you better get your gun before he does. Go to hell, you know. I had a head rush from smoking weed. I do not do that anymore. I try to stay away from drugs. I promised myself that I would stay clean from weed.

 

    My last days will be spent having fun together. I do not want to fight with you. You don't have to worry about me. I know the game, but not this kind of game. You need to walk across town and tell people you have a job. You have to use a phone for business. You have to be selling keys to get a lot of money.

 

    My thoughts about this life we put this up for our kids. I know it is the best life that we can give them. When they get older, they will have everything they want from us. We need to think about their life right now and what they want to do when they get older.

    My baby understands me. She knows I feel that way. So why rush when we are still kids loving what we have. Moe, you know I care about you, and you call the children. That made me feel good, and I do love all of you. In this lifetime, I promise I will be the man you need it.

    They meet up in front of the concert. There are many girls there. Well, guess what he runs into. So he says, "do you remember me?" She replies, "yes." He says, "we could date." She says, "yes." So they start dancing to the music. He is having fun with her, and then they kiss each other. Things are heating up. They ask each other if they want to go home with me when this is all over.

 

    When it's over, they go home to each other. So they're talking about what's going to happen. He asks her whether she smokes weed. She said, "yes." And then she gets up and gets a bottle of Moe wet. She takes out that bottle to find out while he's getting high. They are trying to set the mood right. They started getting faded. They walk to the bed and undress. All of you know the rest of it.

 

    They get up the following day knowing what happens. They have no regrets about it. Her man came home and caught them in the house. He is flipping out. He is yelling. She is saying, baby, but you were not there for me. She tells him that you do your own thing, I know. So it's over and the man she had sex with says goodbye. She says never to leave her. Nevertheless, he says that he has to go. That means she will be alone by herself.

 

    I remember what you meant when you said you had been down for me. I'm crying because you came by my side, and we went to bed. I remember telling you how much I love you. When we go to heaven, I want to be with you because we have been together for a long time. Just think about sleeping with me. I know you don't have a problem. Do not startup. Let us stay on track.

                                                                  CHAPTER 73

    I'm thinking of getting you back into my arms. Would you like that again? I don't blame you for thinking I hurt you. Nevertheless, I pass my test. Suppose you know everything about me and what is inside of my soul. I can make the rain come down like no other. People believe that bringing things to the table makes him a man. Nevertheless, there are many things you have to do. Like, love me. Heaven Is an excellent place to start. Up there, I will like to see how they live.

 

    I hope there are no crimes. Being intelligent means that you will care for your children. That is the best feeling in life. Knowing that they are good, I'm here to play my part as a father. Nobody is going to take that from me. Every day they are on my side. Keep your head in the right place. If I live for the money, it is as if you are ready to pile up before being shot.

 

    Peep game, the mind of a gangster, cannot get hit up. I'm Sporty going to do things that only a one and a million can do. Get your act together with faith. I am not the person that I used to be. You Want to play with me. My wife is alive and well. She lives her life with her man with a great deal of money. Those girls will try and catch you for everything you own.

 

    My name is little l's. I had many friends whom I fuck with. Some older men were named Blank, and the others were named Blank. Clyde was one of my souls met on that gangster shit to tell you the truth. Chopping grams up with blank. Blank was l's daughter. In all, little l's had about 80 keys of cocaine. Blank wanted to go out of town. He needed l's to go with him, but l's said not yet. He was not rushing him, but that is the type of moves blank was making.

 

    Blank hands are hurting from chopping all of them grams up. L's telling her that we have to go out of town with the rest of the keys. So Blank seems like, all right. Blank is out of town doing his thing out there. The money comes from all our work. It is looking like it is paying off. Too many moves are being made that have the blank mad. They want to lock anybody that is down with this. They do not give a fuck.

    They wanted us to close things quickly. Nevertheless, we were not giving a fuck about jail. We knew that some people could not be that trusted. With all of this money, people would hate you. Even people who worked for you in this game had no choice but to get back where I was supposed to be. I had no interest in the people who did this to me. The best thing for me was to give neither handshake until I was where I needed to be.

    Let them see the money accumulate before them. I have to make up for a wasted time. Now my money has been spent. I can do whatever I want without selling it., the last thing is not talking shit you do not know while working on my writing. This game is so fucked up that you got crazy people to talk about. That is why I would not get in this game with some people. I'm a trustworthy person, and I will never talk. They say if you want to keep something from somebody, you put it in a book.

 

    The words coming from my mouth cannot even explain what happened in my life. The pressure of a growing family and the children with it all depends on me. You know I'll deal with it. How can we make up for a lost time? We're supposed to get together very soon. It seems like many kids are being born. Lay, I hope you remember what I told you when I saw you and know where she is at in my heart.

    We have many conversations about what we want to do. I do not realize what we are talking about? I have been making it work for us for the last 24 years. I always wear

green color. How can you get into this game? You have to know people that are in this game. I moved keys for thousands of dollars every week. Many people want me alive, but I will tell you my story about what happened. 

 

    I am not upset about the way my family handled me selling drugs. Some of the men in my family do not like me. Nevertheless, I do not know the reason for it. In this game, things can go good or go wrong. I want to be in this game without the problems. However, I know that is hard because everybody has problems in this game. My family will body whoever wants beef with us. It is not a problem for all of you to die. 

    Let us keep the bodies coming trust me. I do not want to die because I have a family to care for. By the way, you have to be a real drug dealer to be a part of this. Times may be hard for you, but you handle that and be a man. You find yourself loving the money. You may forget about your friends. That is still on the corner selling drugs. That is why my friends mean a lot to me. We all need help when we are in this game. We have to trust one another.

 

    We all know the codes of the streets. You do not tell on each other. That is the way you get killed when you talk about people. I wanted to make a name for myself out here. I have a lot of close friends. How can we understand what we are doing if that is all we know? I will not stop doing what I am doing because the money comes from. You know that this is all we know how to do, and we will stick to it.

 

    Enemies are there for life. So do not fuck with them. You have to watch your back because they will murder you. I need money for my family to be a costume for the right things, not the wrong ones. I do not want to sell drugs. Despite that, I grew up around drugs. I meant it is a problem to me. No one cared what happened to me because everyone is in this drug business.

 

    Problems are a part of everybody's life. Sometimes I get mad because it has changed. Nothing has changed. Nevertheless, I know my kids will have to have everything. This is something I'm going to make sure of. It is a must to be wrong. It is a must to have money. It is a must to dress nice. That is all we know, and we know about nice cars. To have the money, you have to show it. It is not me, but I want to stack it and make sure those in my life live right.

 

    Sometimes I can see myself murdered by someone that's in this game. My friends, it will help if you look at them because they do not want you to have money. I can tell that they do not want me in this game because I manage my business. I have high hopes that my dreams will come true. I cannot let them bring me down to their level. Everybody in this game has money if you are doing it. That is the way that I look at it. I am a little scared because I do not want anybody to get locked up. 

    I need to do it right now. You do not understand how it is to be a drug lord. Baby, be there for me. I know it is hard. Nevertheless, while I am hustling, you should stay faithful because I am true to you. Everything that I do, I do for you. All the money goes into your bank account. I need you because it's not the same as you if I am with someone else. Because I trust you, and you should trust me at all times. This shit does not mean anything without you there. Baby, you understand that right. I want to hold you tight and never let you go. We talk every night. That is the only way that we can spend time together. I am just letting you know that I am not mad. I want my family back.

 

    The best move a man can make is when the pressure is on. We'll make it happen. Gangsters live by the code of the streets. People break these so call codes every day. I live by them because my uncle always told me that you have to fight for it if you want something. You are supposed to believe in your childhood friends. I hope they support you when times get hard.

    I cannot change right now. This must be the best life I can live without worrying. Let us talk right now. Remember when everything was different. Now it is at its best. You were not calling when I was doing poorly. Now I got my act together. Why feel wrong about something that could never be. I am just sitting here remembering the good times when I live on Convent Ave. Being away from home has made me better. I just have to take care of my creations on earth. I always keep my family first. This is for my kids. I love you all.

 

    I am disconnected from life due to my work. Is it wrong for me to want the best for our kids? Working while I am young, so the kids won't want anything when I get older. This is hard, but you being with me makes my life easy. Baby, long nights at home texting you. It's one of those things I can't leave behind. Be that as it may, the important thing is to keep my family. I know those thoughts are in your mind as well. That is why I am writing it down. So you can understand what has gone on in a father's mind that wants to be a father to these kids. I wish us nothing but the best.

 

    Baby, you make me a better man. Keep up the excellent work. If I fall, will you hold me up? I just want to hear it. This is a significant relationship for me. It is levels to this shit. You have everything that a woman could ever want from me. This is the last time you tell me that you forgive me. Let me take that as a yes. The next thing I know, it's in my sleeves. This is a new start to a happy home. Baby, do not make me love you with all of my heart. I like every suggestion of where we should eat. Yeah, the kid can get nasty at times.

                                                               CHAPTER 74

    This calls for a celebration. Are you down with me? Let me know before things get deep. Why make games when you and I are in love. Look at my eyes with the thought of cheating on me. Can you handle taking care of yourself without your man listen to me? That is going to be hard? I cannot get over the time we spent together when we were young. Now we're both older. Is it anything you want to say to me? A detachment with us, not as one. I will always obey, and you should do the same.

 

    He hears what she said about us. Yeah, we can be together. God bless the time we share. I will never leave you alone when so much is in my heart. This is when I tell you to love real. Nothing happens without permission from us. One of the reasons I say home is where I want to be is to make my bed now. I have to lay in it. Without my family lying in it with me, it would not be a bed. How can we make this life last forever? It's when you don't want to be here anymore. How can a man let go of something so promising?

 

    Life goes on and on. You have to stand out from everybody else. They say a closed mouth does not get fed. Nevertheless, my family does not have to ask for anything. I love making space for us to take care of ourselves. Making intelligent choices makes it better. You have to understand that we are in a fight, and that is what we are fighting for. When there is more love, there is less fighting. The only time we fight is to keep our relationship moving forward. Everybody has their opinion about how our life should be. Let us just prove them wrong and stick together.

 

    Pick and choose whom you want in your life. You know, just going by with what I saw missing, doubt about it. Having you close to me means everything to me. When we ride, we ride together. Looking at you, make a good understanding that things are okay. You look better than me. When everybody is on the same page, we can get more done. A man who will do whatever you know. When I see what the rite is trying to do, you know that. We can take care of ourselves. Turn you into my pride and joy in my Fat Joe voice.

    Holding back your love. From a man that just wants what's best for you. This game baby taking trips all over the world. Do what you want to do when you want to do it. Does that make you feel like a queen? I know the game and know it well. I have been grinding since I was nine years old. Do this because my uncle would've wanted it like this. Money just wants to go into blood code. 510 what do you say 1500. When I call you and you say get back at me and I say I just got back at you. 212 pull up with this conversation you talk a good one you buffing.

    So the year 1987 this young man named Ellison. Was at two twins' houses. He stays there until Sunday. Sunday came so their mother drives him home to 151st in convent Ave. When he got out of the car. Ellison is closest to the car door. He walks up on the sidewalk to where all of his family was at. He has this look on his face. Like a puzzled look. He didn't speak to any one of his family members, He walked through the first door and then walked through the second door. He walked through the hallway. He got in front of his door and enters the house.

    I went to where my cousin was at. Looked her dead in her eyes like murder. Then she picks up the triple five and slashes me in the temple. When they found me I must have had blood all over the sofa. They rush me to the hospital. I could feel them putting me in a body bag. Sewing my temple back up. After they finish sewing it back up I woke up. After a couple of days. Just getting off the hospital bed and walking out of the hospital building was a blessing.

    I can remember entering the house where I got the triple five at. So I just played as if nothing happen. At seven years old I and sex walked out of the house to go to school. When we got to the corner she yells out for money. I turned around walking back up the stairs. Enter the first door then enters the second door. Then walked into the house and saw my uncle. Ran to the closet grab the baby nine aimed for the temple where the triple five was itching me. Pulled the trigger nothing goes off. My uncle walks to the closet and I handed him the baby nine.

    The game why would I be involved with people that are in it. Let me tell you why not tellers. I was born in the '80s but the '90s raise me. When it was a few loyal people in it. I can't help it I got to tell the truth. Gun on the shelf. Totoo bad nothing in the chamber cause I would've got rid of me. Uncle you wouldn't want to be out here with these so-called gangsters. If you are in the game hold your head and stay true.

    I want to cop big houses and nice cars. But for now, I have to stay on the grind. Maybe one day I can have all of that. I got this feeling it's coming to me. Whoever is with me when I grind that's the family. That's what I will do with no questions asked. Just sitting here with deep thoughts. My shorty would be turning in her grave if I wasn't one of the most respected people in this game. Yeah, I'm doing excellent with this time can't wait to see you.

    What is crossing me means for them fuck the other side. I saw the south not just visiting it being out there with wires. Breaking you down not where are you aren't that important. It's four told when you ask too about what went through. But l's knowing it's hot fuck it sent ATF to the house. I'm going out in cuffs. 2months isn't that long for me I will do it.

    Going to the next step thanks to Layla how can I get out of that check it. Just stay focused on home and every moment will help you out. Troublesome as 2pac would say warning as biggie smalls would say. Riding with wires ready to find who we are looking for status is now turned on 101. Sex money murder I have bones to pick with you so don't get caught up.

    Being strong when their other men in your life. Help me understand. On the other side, I need a woman that's trustworthy of my time. Whether it's in mind or conversation. You know what for my sake back off. This knowledge that I have will lead me in the right direction. Kept a strong head on my shoulders. This life has just begun let sixteen out the clip inside of my women. This might be the best time to say thank you. Babies are born into our life. Maybe I deserve a woman that's with me and only me. It's over separate I ain't going to trip. This must be the hardest thing a man has to do. And that walks out of an uncomfortable relationship. You can't tell me one good time we had. Or a standing place we are in. Just follow your heart. It doesn't matter who gets hurt in this companionship.

    How when where are you. Who knows this young gangster. Been out here for a long time. She said she want a rapper or an R&B singer. Guess what I'm both of them. Got the game in a frenzy. This can't be true for us not to understand the way. I set this life for my family. She is out clubbing I respect a businesswoman who's coming home with something on the table. My woman making money by the caseload and her husband will still lock and load. We have to have a connection with what's going on in these streets. If we plan on making this company last.

    When there's a will there's away. Let's make sure time doesn't catch up to us. In a good way, I pray every night that the man upstairs blesses me. Writing for millions of people that are reading my writings. I just want y'all to know I'm so thankful for the love of what I love to do. That's the time I take what I have learned about these streets. Learn how to bag up then get money. Stack money for my ladies that I love eternally.

    Battling each other for what when your hold game fake as fuck. How in the fuck do you claim that gangster shit. Jake on my back maybe he hit me for what plead the fifth. If you were born in then maybe you were sworn in it. It's in my blood to be real. Who helps L'S guns makes a lot of people move. Telling y'all touch money is all I see. Got some DAMU got some LOCS and 74. 410 what the kid on the count thought you couldn't notice.

    When I was in the south. Gangster Disciple crazy them people give it up. Guns slow life when one time rides only two Jake every five hours. I fuck with them. They had a lot of love for this blood just writing this letter to let people know I'm not one-minded. Who Boss B-HAM don't ask why this album cause up top got a lot of Morr D. If anybody love this gangster shit. One nation under and above life.

    Grinding means helping others out. That's one of the most important parts of life. My guess stays true to your family. When one falls your friends can hold you up. You can't play it's a game you cannot win. Try to be the best that you can be. Money shouldn't change the way you live. Have a good head on your shoulder. This shit is hard when we as brothers have to eat. We just have to help one another as brothers.

    Yo, when will you learn everybody ain't here for you but one thing you have to win. What the fuck do you look like trusting these females. Keeping my head dead in the book. Yes, I'm counting my blessings from the man upstairs. When you have him sitting on the left side of your hand it is possible to feel me. I got to stay focused on what it is I'm trying to do. Life is too short ninjas will use you for money. I'm in these streets. Ain't nobody saying anything about that. Until you put yourself in that situation.

    The way I miss you. I promise to never let anybody take your place. The way you use to handle my business out here on these streets. I remember the conversation we had when you said go handle your business and I'm going to handle mine. Kissing your lips felt so good. Looking out of the window seeing the stars and the moon at night knowing you are watching over me. Like you are my angel I know why God needed you close to him because you are a reflection of me and taking me at that time wasn't in his plans.

                                                                CHAPTER 75

    You mean everything to me. I know money isn't everything and being there is better than money. But your mother got me working hard to give you the best life that you could ever want baby I love you. I miss you so much I miss holding you in my arms. I remember the first time I saw you I was walking up the block at a block party and your mother and her friend was talking to one of her male friends and I kept walking she came up to me and said that's your daughter and I said I know. After the block party was over we walked together to my house and you and your mother stay overnight at my house.

    The hustle doesn't stop keep getting your money. Watch your back feel me. I had to come to an understanding that the world moves on and on. You have to be on your grind. Pass work off to those who buy from the game. Meanwhile, I have the connections that ninjas want but I'm not giving up on myself. Miss me with the bull shit plan carefully never let them get the upper hand on me and if so I bet the baby nine isn't playing know game with anyone. As hard as it is you have to be a man and stand up.

    The more you do the more he wants to fall back. Can't make up my mind about you. Yes, the misses are you and our life has to move forward because there's nothing more to do for you. The life we have let's share this time and make sure it lasts forever. I'm humble let's see how far this is going to go. I'm at the last straw in this relationship. You need these playful vibes. I promise to make our relationship last the words you told me.

    When you work hard I don't want to end up in court or go to black justice. In the game, there are a lot of people that be telling each other. I can't understand how ninjas go to jail and are out quicker than a mother fucker or if it's a long time and the time gets cut in half or little to nothing. Ninja if you get the time you have to do it. If you get out early I guess that's what they call good behavior. I just don't get it. People say mase left because of who I asked him S.M.M feel me.

    I hope I can get these raps to the end of time. I'm working hard for you and you know that right baby. Loving that body you coming out of the shower. When I'm at your house for what is it game you running on me. Called you and she responded in a voice that I never heard before. It sounds like this baby I love you. Tell me if I'm taking it too far or is this going to work out for the best of me. Yes, I have a 1on1 feel and I love her with all of my soul.

    What the fuck do I have to go through to stay focused. Only Lord knows how hard I worked on this. The pace means everything to me. The satisfaction of knowing you did it means a lot to me. The grind is the waiting period you take to get where you want to be at. It seems like it never ends work I mean. Planning the moves that you are going to make. When you own the company you have been working so hard for. The time you put into your writing at night and in the daytime and afternoon.

    The sweat the pain the worries death the life. Whatever you are involved with just hold your head up. Keep pushing through life. Look God right in his eyes and ask for what you want. Trust me he will give you what you asked for in due time. That's what you call prayer and you pray with your hands together. That's the way he hears your thoughts. It's up to him rather you deserve his blessings feel me. You do good for others and good will come to you.

    Fall back and let me handle this. The way a real man handles his business out here. Let go never get upset or yell at you baby. I'm taking care of you for the rest of your life. We pretend nothing is wrong with what we see. Yeah, people single me out and now look at people asking for my help hope all is well. The reason we are in this place is that we grind for this spot. Everybody was asking me why and I said because I had money in it.

    Get down and dirty a man wants a female like that no. I want one that respects herself all of the time. One that got an education one that has businesses one that's getting to her bag but also respects herself. One that knows when to tell another man no. If he tries to get her number. One that's faithful one that looks out for her man even if I'm not there. One that has my back. That's a lot to ask but if she's a Godly woman that's where she stood.

    Live your life to the fullest understand me. What you don't know won't hurt you. But if she is doing things behind your back that's someone you can't trust. Trust me what's in the dark comes to light. I'm doing this to let people know how hard it is to trust a female. If I have to watch everything you do that's not a happy relationship and if you have to watch what I do means you don't trust me either. I have a business to attend to so watching you only going to make me lose money and I'm not letting that happen feel me.

    If you know me then you know I'm one of the best rappers out there. I'm building this company that can't be stopped. I'm showing true talent feel me. I'm not giving up on my dreams you can't take from me and expect me to do nothing. Ninjas will remember me for getting this money the company that I own is at the top of all top companies. It takes time to write how much I have written or should I say writing. My head stays in this book so my family has nothing to worry about. What do you want a man that hustles hard I'm looking for a woman that hustles hard I want women that work harder than I hold you down.

    I love you. You put me where I need to be. These other girls mean nothing to me. Money spends on you because of the way you connect with me. I'm digging deep in my heart and guess what I found out. You are the one for me. Taking care of you but I can't help but wonder if you are using me for money. If not girl the world is in your hands. The growing with you and you loving me while I love you. This is a mission impossible let's prove them wrong. I'm doing my best in this relationship. The way you look like you are the only one with me.

    Get with the movement and don't be know follower feel me. Keep your mind on what it is you are trying to do. Stay to yourself girls out here having sex with a lot of people. Please don't get it fucked up. If a man has sex with a lot of females he's a player but if she has sex with a lot of men she's you know what. Please keep mine to me and yourself. I don't need ninjas to be talking about my shorty sleep with everyone out there. You know what you signed up for yeah I'm faithful. Get money please don't worry about what a female is doing.

    Catch up ninjas I'm doing big things in my life. Blood gets shit popping feel me. Hustle for real like no other. When you find the outcome of the game. You part yourself from that game. A' lot of females don't want a ninja with a job. I'm playing the game whichever way you get your money make sure you keep your money to yourself. Hustle for yourself having this life you can't find a ninja-like me in these streets. The grind doesn't stop because you got locked up. Yeah, I miss my dog for real. I'm getting out of my feelings. Trying to remain sane.

    When you feel the pressure. Let me keep mine to me and I mean it this time. You have to move like you out here by yourself feel me. Stop and don't do things for anybody anymore feel me. Why the calls I think it's just to use me but guess what I got all of my blessings. I'm not pressing anybody to be with me. My female is up in heaven and that's where I'm going later feel me. I can't wait but until I'm there I'm taking care of my daughters. Baby daddy loves you for the work I'm putting into this game. Trust me everything has its ups and downs. It's how you handle it.

    Everybody has a chance to do something super in their life. Mine happens to be writing stories and I'm proud of myself for going all the way with this and not giving up on it. Write until you can't write anymore feel me. When it's all or nothing you will do your best and watch the outcome be super. You can't hold back my mind telling me to keep growing up and be a man out here. Make smart moves that are what a lady that has her life set is looking for. One that can do for herself and wants you to bring something to the table feel me. Somebody she can grow with.

    I'm telling you right now the way things are going to go in a relationship with me. We are equal partners I know you feel that way what more can I say. Getting down at any time is a strong woman but can get nasty at times. One that keeps her level up gangster. This is a match made in heaven feel me. Yes, I'm causing havoc in this game. You are the definition of a gangster. Making sure I'm okay I'm making sure you are okay that's what your partner does for you. Even when you fall I'm here to pick you back up and make sure you get back on your grind.

    I'm in the streets. When you play in these streets. You better know life can go either way. A' lot of people died from this game or they go to black justice. I can't end up in that situation. Yeah, I'm in the house working. I see people in and out of black justice. My daughters could never take me going to jail. I have to talk to them every day of their lives to let them know it's okay. Planning for them to be great means so much to me. There's nothing I wouldn't do for them. This is why I'm building this empire so they never have to work a day in their life feel me. My grind shows all they now know is daddy this daddy that y’all mothers misses the both of us.

    When you are wanting to go out and hang out in the streets. There are a lot of females out there as well as a lot of ninjas. I don't know what you want the way you change things up. Who to trust she's giving me a sexy vibe. With all of these females that are willing to be with a young ninja getting this money. Tell me what I need from you. You can't do anything for me. I need one that can help me grow if that's you I can't tell right. If I get the heart to talk to a young shorty. She may be the one that helps me grow and what's next is counting all of this money. You into me and I are into you. The way she looks at me when her eyes cross mine.

    Let's be friends if you help me out. I'm going to help you out. Yes, we can be more in time what's your status are you single. Yes, I'm single let's face it who cares about your boyfriend unless that's me holding you close feel me. How come you deserve this love I'm giving you all of me to make you happy. That's all I want to do to you. Ghost what's popping everything you want is yours. Who would've thought this Junk town ninja would fuck with a girl from ghost town. Let's keep getting this money to follow the rules of this game. Undressing you with my mind followed by sexing you.

                                                                     CHAPTER 76

    This is the shit that gets me hyped up. When you are in my bedroom taking off your clothes and getting naked with nothing but heels on. She started to lighten up to get high but of course, I’m drinking. Yes, she's more faded than me. I'm climbing on top of her. So do I have to tell you what else happened or use your imagination? I'm all for getting mine as well as she's getting hers. She's the one and only one I want in this lifetime. I'm talking to you about how many females is the question. I want all that I can sleep with if she's okay with it. We can all be friends. I promise to take care of all of y'all let's experience the life that I have for you.

    You are always here for me. That's what I like to see from you. My love may find you in your heart. I appreciate what she's doing for me. The love of my life accepts anyone trying to enter my heart. First, we can start by talking in the mind that's how I undress you. It ain't about sex that's the last thing you need in a relationship baby. The time away from you is hard. Helping me means a lot to me. You feeding me means a lot to me. Taking care of you is all I want to do for you. You said I was the one for you. We can't separate ourselves from one another never and I mean that.

    As I get close to you I'm wondering how that body feels. Do you remember when I had you a long time ago now it's about the joint that I had when I was younger and it's about the known females that are with me? You stay on my mind baby this is the feeling that you give me when you are on top. I'm the one that does for you so why would you cross me. I'm on the bottom of you watching you riding the d got me open trust me. I'm watching your body move side to side and up and down. When this here is over yes I'm going to call you. She's asking me don't treat me like one of these chicks you play.

    You always talking about what you are going to do to me. I can't wait until the day you do something to me. Everybody wants a girl that's faithful to him, not one that's for everyone. I'm watching you out the corner of my eyes. I'm watching you grow into a young lady here let me help you become a woman. She wants a ninja that doesn't talk about who they hit in other words had sex with. You show your true feeling I ain't touching anyone. That's why a lot of females that are not on these streets want a man like me. Let's come to terms with what you want me. People think I'm tricking no I'm just investing mine in women that know what she wants.

    When you see this young ninja getting money maybe the baby is his. Whatever it is I'm here let me fix this if not I'm like 100 feet away from you. You made your bed now lay in it. Fast money ain't always good money. Nowadays you need slow money to stack up nice and easy. When you are on the move hustling means you getting bigger ninjas can't fill your shoes. I might have to let my lady handle the baby nine. Yeah, it's hell in NYC the devil is evil look what the takeaway got us. Grinding like no other. When you are a baby pit with a red nose feel me bite strong half of the key will put me right where I'm supposed to be.

    So my brother heard me when I said Pete I'm reaching and he came through like a big brother. S.M.M until the day I die. I'm trying to change my life because that's what my brother would've wanted from me. I can hear him now telling me to keep my head up. All of this is just writings. Yeah, it's hell on earth you are all alone in this world. The question is why and he answered with I will. From Simlack to Rollack if you don't feel that. Biggie said 16teen floor check it why is that your date of Birthday sex. You are my queen and I will do anything for you believe me when I say ninjas did cross me please excuse my status.

    As days go by we learn more about our partners. I'm all for the love that you have for me if it's for me and nobody else. Connection names and other sorts of stuff let me know that these are my children. That's what I'm hoping for. Nevertheless if not I have to go on with my life right and leave all of the ladies that I thought were in my life alone right. Okay coming together as a family helps so much because we will have one another's back at all times right. That's a sign of us sticking together right. Letting nothing happen to each other right. Whether it's you or me we have to take care of our responsibilities right.

    Catch me in the drop-top riding around with my ninjas. Hustling gets money when we are at the top we still won't rest feel me. Gangsters lay down how many shots ninjas can take. Fuck what ninjas think hold mine down. Re-up always who got more pounds than my ninjas. Yeah, we got bricks to in the house chopping dimes up too. It's the way we live our lives in the streets. Looking over our shoulders from 12. Gambling is always on the corners. Watching ninjas that are trying to get at us. You see me low a little bent but my ninjas stay high feel me. When you put money up who's money bigger. Leaving this mic on fire hot like fire ninjas level shit up.

    How about the game ninjas changed the game. I'm going to find myself one that I can lay back with. One that knows her place holding me down. I'm not in these streets. I'm home working on my business moves. That's all I want to do is keep my business at its best. I can't stop making hits. I have to keep my game where it needs to be and that's in the front and at the top. No days off work all day every day fall back if you don't want to be one of the ninjas on the hit list. Getting deep in these streets that's what NYC ninjas do all of the time. Shout out to all my ninjas that love getting money.

    You must stand strong through all of the bull shit. Yes, this life that I love you can't walk a mile in my shoes feel me. You and your ninjas don't cross each other. A lot of ninjas cross one another all of the time. When do the rules apply to everyone? People talk about how many bodies they got. Ninjas talking about all of the drugs they sell. This shit ain't new to me. The best words I have is to keep your business to yourself. Never let ninjas know your next move except for your friends if they are your friends. You are in this game until the day you die feel me.